I was particularly drawn to filmmaking, as it felt like a way to get to know Madrid, not from the outside but through the lives of those who call it home. I felt particularly pulled towards this challenge, of making a documentary, if it meant pushing me away from the NYU bubble. I wanted to challenge myself to meet people, enter real spaces, and, in the end, allow myself to be changed by them.

When I reflect on the process of making this documentary, it feels like many different journeys came out through this project. On our very first shoot, I had never held a boom stick, never been to Lavapiés, yet at 3 pm, the three of us sat confidently in a taxi thinking, What could go wrong? Now I know: almost everything! But that is what documentary making taught me: unexpected things will happen, plans will fall apart, and you just have to keep filming. If I could speak to myself in that taxi, I would tell her that everything will feel like it’s falling apart until that very moment when you finally hand in the film. But that’s what’s beautiful about documentary; it pushed me into a personal journey with perfectionism. I appreciate preparation to expect the unexpected, which filming a documentary will not offer you. No matter how much you prepare, unexpected things will happen, mistakes are inevitable, and you have to learn to trust in the process.

Lavapiés, drag performances, were all new spaces for me, which I had never stepped into before, and learning from Oscar was such a gift. Nativa’s performance was the first live drag show I had ever seen, and being in that space opened me to new forms of expression I had never really understood before. I learned so much from working and listening to Oscar. This documentary changed my experience abroad; Madrid does not feel like a city I studied in, but a place I lived in because I got to live a piece of someone else’s life.

There were countless moments sitting in Oscar's apartment or watching Nativa perform where I stopped and felt overwhelming gratitude for being allowed into his world. Oscar truly holds one of the most beautiful presences; it is wise, generous, and powerfully filled with light. One thing I have felt so deeply here is how certain people in Spain radiate such a truly nice presence. It may seem like something simple, but I have never felt this presence anywhere else. Witnessing his presence is something I will carry with me beyond this film, beyond Madrid. 

My one hope in creating this piece of art is that people anywhere in the world can feel that presence when watching our documentary.